Mother's Day

Last year, I was waiting for Mother's Day with some trepidation. I knew that I would be going to the cemetery with flowers and a pot of chrysanthemums for my mum and my nan. I always take a pot of these for my nan on my mum's behalf and I also take a Mother's Day card from me and a nanny one from the children. Last year Kieron signed it for all three of them. I always become tearful at the cemetery and touch the patch of grass where I buried my mum's ashes. It feels warmer than the rest of the grave. Kieron came to the cemetery once, but stayed close by me all the time. He didn't like the huge stone angels and the thought that he was surrounded by hundreds of dead people.
Last year, I woke up and knocked 3 times on the wall behind my bed...my signal to Kieron that I was awake and wanted a cuddle. This was a usual weekend thing anyway and he always shouted out "just a minute" before scampering in and snuggling up.
Last year, my gift from Kieron was a box of Roses chocolates which he had chosen as he likes them too. Knowing without any doubt whatsoever, that he would be eating quite a lot of them.
Last year, Kieron made me coffee and asked if he could do any thing to help me around the house, but I said no and that I was going to have a lazy day.
Last year we got a takeaway for tea and all sat around the table with Jade and I taking the prawns off Callum's and Kieron's plates to eat ourselves. Kieron had his standard fare of special fried rice (prawnless), plain noodles and prawn crackers. The table also had it's standard fare of the same.
This year I woke up and knocked 3 times on the wall behind my bed. And cried.